


i long to be (close)

by explicitly_iridescent



Category: TWICE (Band)
Genre: College AU, F/F, Not too angsty, Not too fluffy, i spam wrote this, just gay, mina is just tryna avoid sana, nayeon is popular and ms worldwide
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2020-05-05
Updated: 2020-05-08
Packaged: 2021-03-03 05:20:29
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 4
Words: 4,222
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/24019651
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/explicitly_iridescent/pseuds/explicitly_iridescent
Summary: Mina didn’t do girls. That was it — she was straight. She’d never questioned, she never asked. And then, well, then: Nayeon.
Relationships: Chou Tzuyu/Son Chaeyoung, Im Nayeon/Myoui Mina, Kim Dahyun/Minatozaki Sana
Comments: 22
Kudos: 161





	1. the start

**Author's Note:**

> please leave some kudos n comments hehe

Mina didn’t _do_ girls. That was it — she was straight. She’d never questioned, she never asked. And then, well, then: Nayeon.

Nayeon smiled with pretty girl fangs and hunger pangs.

Here’s one more thing: Mina doesn’t _do_ popular people—they were always problematic or entrenched with questionable people, even if they themselves, as individuals, might have been bearable and good.

But, then: Nayeon.

/

“Hey,” Nayeon said, propping her bag next to Minai’s on the bench. “Haven’t seen you in awhile.”

Mina looked up from her laptop and smiled. “Yeah, yeah. How are you?” It was weird, she knew that. Nayeon had dated her best friend Sana a year ago, and that relationship had crashed and burned, so, yeah. It was weird. Sana was the type of friend who demanded loyalty in the likes of never being friends with her exes.

And Mina, well, they were best friends.

“Good, good,” Nayeon said and threw her a smile. She was one of those people, Mina had come to notice, that meant it when she said she was good. She also had one of those faces: easy to read, easy to understand. “You?”

Nayeon didn’t really ask Mina that and mean it before. Mina’s a side character. She’s never had a conversation with Nayeon that didn’t include Sana. Now, it seems different.

“I’m good. Stressed. Finals and all that stuff.”

“Oh, _tell me about it_. I’m fucking failing Science, dude. Who even fails Science in college?”

Mina laughs. “Hey, I’m having a hard time in Chem too.”

“My science class,” Nayeon says with a childish pout, “is _bio,_ Mina. Who fails Bio?”

“Maybe, if you stopped going out every other day…” Mina doesn’t know where the teasing comes from, but it feels familiar.

Nayeon and her talk for another ten minutes, before a slew of Nayeon’s friends come to get her and she leaves with a smile and a promise to talk more, and then there: Mina, alone and intrigued.

/

It’s not that it becomes a habit, but Mina starts saying hi to Nayeon. They stopped saying hi after the whole _Sana and Nayeon dump fire break up_ , but now, Nayeon waves at Mina and gives her sunshine smiles every time they bump into each other, which is, well, a lot.

Mina had just never noticed before, or had learned to stop noticing. Sana’s way of moving on was to pretend Nayeon didn’t exist, and Mina had fallen into that plan. She stopped noticing Nayeon after the _hellfire break up_.

Now, it seems like, she can’t _stop_ noticing Nayeon.

She’s everywhere.

On the second floor, inside one of the classrooms, at the quad, at the cafe. Everywhere.

And she’s always smiling at Mina, and it’s not small; it’s the big dimpled smile that Mina’s sure she’s seen other people trip over.

Mina just waves and gives her little quirked lips. It still feels like betrayal.

/

Momo tells her that she’s got a new flavour of the week. Mina rolls her eyes and flicks a piece of rice at her. She dodges and groans.

“Hey!” she exclaims. “So not cool. I spent so much time fixing my hair today.”

Mina chuckles. “And it’s still ugly.” Which, not true, Momo is gorgeous, and she’s also a fuckgirl. Which is why Minai will never compliment her half-sister. Unlike Momo and her salacious ways, Mina was waiting for marriage and had never had flings. She didn't waste her time on dating if she didn't think it was going to lead to something more fruitful.

“You’re just sad that we’re half siblings,” Momo teases her, wriggling her eyebrows.

“Shut up, you _bitch_!”

/

Mina runs into Nayeon at a party. Go figure. It was more likely that she’d run into Nayeon, than Nayeon would run into her, because well, Mina didn’t _do_ parties, and getting drunk, and all that stuff. No shame in the game, it just wasn’t her thing, which, big deal and hard to accomplish, if your best friend was Sana whose one goal in life was to outdrink every single heartbreak she’d ever experienced.

Nayeon’s doing shots with Dahyun and Jeongyeon, her two best friends, and doesn’t even pretend not to see Mina. Before Mina knows it, Nayeon’s already made her way to her through the string of bodies, and has kissed her cheek.

The brown eyed girl gives her the famed dimpled smile. “Hey! You’re here!”

Minai’s still reeling from how fast it all happened: first, she registers the fact that Nayeon just kissed her cheek, and her lips are so soft, second, she registers how good Nayeon smells amidst a throng of sweaty college students, and third, Nayeon’s arm which has snaked it’s way around Mina’s waist. In the time she’d unfriended the popular girl, Mina had forgotten just how touchy she was.

Their close proximity does wonders in tying Mina’s tongue. It takes her a moment to answer Nayeon, but Nayeo’s smile never wavers, nor does her gaze, and being in such close proximity with her, it finally registers in Mina’s brain that Nayeon is already tipsy.

“Hey, how long have you been here?” she finally asks.

Nayeon furrows her eyebrows and hums. “I think for around two hours already.” She pouts. “You came so late! It’s, like, twelve already!”

And that was the plan. Come late, leave early. Mina doesn’t say this. Instead, she schools her face into a sorry expression.

“Yeah, my loss,” she says, trying to make it sound genuine.

“NABONG!!! ONE MORE SHOT!!! WHERE ARE YOU?” Jeongyeon yelled loudly over the crowd, suddenly interrupting their conversation.

Nayeon lets go of Mina, but not before giving her head a pat, which was child-like and drunk in a way that can only be described as adorable. “I have to go.”

“Yes, yes you do,” Mina says with a chuckle. “See you around.”

Nayeon is already halfway to Jeongyeon and Dahyun when she throws Mina one last smile.

/

Mina posts a picture to her 5,000 insta followers, and Nayeon comments on it. It’s a picture Mina’s half-sister, Momo, had taken last summer of Mina standing by the Champs-Elysées, smiling as she’s bathed in sunlight. The picture gets 1450 likes, and 378 comments, and one of those was Nayeon.

Nayeon comments a wink face and a “cALL ME UR BABY BAGUETTE!!!” and Mina can’t help but smile as she likes the comment and replies with a tongue out emoji.

/

Mina isn’t the type to do drama, but unfortunately, Sana is. It happens like this: Mina, Chaeyoung, Tzuyu, and Sana are all sitting down and eating lunch. Everything is fairly normal, until suddenly it isn’t.

Sana levels a glare Mina’ss way. “You’ve been pretty chummy with Nayeon.”

Mina nearly chokes into her pasta. She takes a moment to swallow her food before meeting Sana’s gaze. She decides to play dumb. “Hm?”

“Mina, you know, my Ex-Who-I-Despise-And-Ruined-My-Life,” Sana continues matter of factly. “The one you’ve recently been so chummy with.”

Chaeyoung’s eyes widen in shock as she looks back and forth between the two girls, while Tzuyu simply rolls her eyes and continues eating.

“It’s,” _nothing_ Mina almost says, and it really isn’t that big of a deal, but saying _nothing_ feels a lot like invalidating Nayeon. Mina’s not in the business of invalidating anyone. “Not a big deal.”

Sana looks like she’s about to argue, but Tzuyu pins her with such a strong look, that she doesn’t.

Mina keeps eating.


	2. strange things

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> once more, comments and kudos are super duper appreciated. ur fic suggestions are also being taken note of !!! i write for itzy, rv, mamamoo, loona, and twice :> occasionally, i might do other fandoms

Mina’s not even shocked when she runs into Nayeon outside of the Social Sciences building. Nayeon’s leaning against one of the pillars, deep in conversation with a girl Mina doesn’t really recognize because her back is turned. She flashbacks to Sana’s apprehension about the two of them seeming _chummy_ , and decides to nip the flower in the bud.

Yes, Nayeon seems to be an _okay_ person, but Mina _really_ wants to avoid drama, and _really_ doesn’t want to make Sana upset. She skirts around the older girl, and hopes to make a successful—

“—Mina!” _Of course._

Mina turns her head, and there: Nayeon, dimpled smile, and eager eyes. The older girl’s already making her way to the Japanese student, a hand wrapped around the girl she’s talking to’s arm, dragging her along.

“Hey,” Nayeon greets her.

Mina tries to smile back. “Hi, Nayeon.”

“Mina, this is Jennie, Jennie this is MIna,” Nayeon introduces the pretty girl with slanted eyes to Mina and vice versa.

Jennie gives her a friendly enough smile, but there’s something sharp in her gaze, Mina can’t quite decipher. It isn’t hostility, but it’s something. She realizes she _knows_ Jennie, or at least knows of. She’s one of those girls in university: blooming instagram, took cheerleading from high school into college, walks around and makes everyone stare. Mina’s been around just Nayeon whenever they bump into each other that she forgot that _this_ was Nayeon’s crowd.

Jennie extends a hand out when Mina doesn’t react at first.

“Hi, nice to finally meet you.”

Mina snaps out of it. She takes Jennie’s hand. “You too.”

“Where you headed?” Nayeon asks, tilting her head to the side.

“Uh…” To be honest, Mina wasn’t really headed anywhere. She was still about to decide as her class had just ended, but for some reason she knew that if she told the older girl this—

“—we should have lunch together!” Nayeon exclaims.

Jennie gives them an apologetic smile. “I’d love to join, but,” she checks her phone. “My girlfriend Jisoo really wants to have a lunch date. I’ll catch up with you soon, Nabong.” She kisses Nayeon on the cheek, and then gives Mina that same sharp gaze and small smile. “You too, Mina.”

Then, she’s gone.

Nayeon looks at Mina expectantly. “Lunch?”

Mina thinks about Sana, about _hellfire break ups that last a whole year_ , and knows she should say no, but as Nayeon grins at her, eyes forming crescent moons, with a look so genuine it would feel like a crime to say no, Mina nods her head.

/

Lunch is quick and a bit rushed, but Nayeon has this amazing ability to make everything seem leisurely. She always looks nonplussed, unbothered (Sana had called insensitive).

They don’t go anywhere fancy because Mina still has a class in thirty minutes, and Nayeon has an org meeting to go to, so they go to one of the university cafes, sit in a secluded corner, and eat their cheap lunch in relative silence.

“Their calamari always tastes like they don’t know what salt or seasoning is,” Nayeon mutters under her breath.

Mina laughs. “It’s more like chewing gum, isn’t it?”

“Yeah, ew. Don’t put the image of squid flavored chewing gum in my mind, please.”

/

Momo absolutely insists that Mina meet her flavor of the week from _last_ week, which is the first time Mina’s ever seen Momo keep someone around for two weeks.

“She must be something special,” Mina comments.

Momo shrugs. “It’s…a he.”

A silence follows them. Mina was convinced Momo had been gay.

“Really?”

“Yeah.”

Mina hums. “Okay.”

“Okay?”

They smile at each other and Mina nods. “Yeah.”

/

Heechul is an older man who has dyed orange hair that reaches his shoulders. When Mina says _older_ , she doesn’t mean by two or three years, she means by like _a decade_. He’s wearing a flower print suit, and talks in an excited high pitched voice, and Mina doesn’t get it.

Momo always liked younger girls who were barely legal and went to church. She liked the challenge of making them do something bad, or whatever.

Heechul looked like a flambouyant gay man in a stereotypical hollywood movie. He spilled his drink twice while they were out, and brandished a _silk handkercheif_ to wipe at it. At first, Mina’s legitimately convinced Momo’s clowning her.

When Heechul and Momo kiss and share soft looks, and Momo puts her arm protectively around him, and he fawns over her, Mina realizes Momo isn’t.

It’s so different, and strange—Mina had thought Momo couldn’t be any more different from her: Momo liked girls and didn’t go to church and quit ballet to do hiphop, while Mina was waiting for the perfect man, sometimes still went to church, and stuck by ballet for years. And now, Momo was here again: dating a man who was a decade and more older than her, who was different and flambouyant, and experimenting with her sexuality _again_.

It gives Mina whiplash.

/

Nayeon asks for her number. They run into each other at the quad while Mina’s reading a paper she has a quiz on, and Nayeon stops walking with her friends to sit next to her for, like, five minutes.

“Hey,” Nayeon says, out of breath from her jog from one end of the quad to Mina’s end.

Mina looks up, surprised, but not by much. She’s somehow gotten used to the older girl’s sudden appearances. “Hey yourself.”

“I have a test in, like, five minutes, but I was afraid I’d forget to ask you, but,” Nayeon flashes her a smile. “Can I get your number?”

Mina’s heart thuds in an unfamiliar way. She raises an eyebrow. “I didn’t know you were interested.”

It’s the first time Mina has ever seen Nayeon blush. “N-no! That’s not what I—“

Mina laughs. “Here’s my number.” She starts reciting it, and finds herself amused by how Nayeon fumbles with her phone to take it all down.

“I’ll text you to hang,” Nayeon says as she stands up and jogs toward her friends.

Mina doesn’t get to reply. Instead, she watches.


	3. hard to say no

**where r u**

_hello, who is this?_

**guess**

Mina furrows her eyebrows and does not reply.

**ok fine here’s a hint: ur cutest friend**

**another hint: possibly ur hottest friend as well**

_i’m friends with chou tzuyu_

**ok but she doesn’t count**

_my half sister is literally hirai momo_

**ok she doesn’t count either**

**fine another hint: ur friend with the best smile**

_i already have sana’s number_

**I’m going to ignore that**

_who is this?_

**uGH URE NO FUN THIS IS NAYEON**

_oh_

_hi nayeon_

**where r u**

_im at the dorm…..why?_

**it’s a saturday**

_yes i know_

**let’s hangout**

Mina had thought saying “no” to Nayeon would have been easier through text, but as she gets bombarded with inventive emojis she’s never even seen used _that_ way, she realizes maybe nothing is easy with Nayeon. (Is this what Sana had meant, a year ago, when she said being with Nayeon was too hard?).

Running into Nayeon on campus grounds was one thing, and getting ambushed by the older girl to hangout randomly was quite normal, but being asked to hangout on a weekend was another _thing_ that Mina didn’t think she could justify to Sana, even if nothing was going on, even if Nayeon and her weren’t really friends.

_i’m sorry, i can’t_

**:( awww r u serious**

_yeah sorry_

**:( i just wanna watch this new film promise it won’t take that long**

MIna sighs.

_what film? not a horror one please_

**never ! it’s a comedy**

**please :(**

**but if you are busy, then it’s okay i understand**

Mina stares at her phone, and thinks about it, even if she knows she’s already lost half of the battle.

_is it a long movie_

**wait i’ll check**

**it’s like 1hr30mins is that okay**

**:)**

Mina knows she’s lost the whole battle when she replies with a _okay I think I can make it._

**YES YES YES**

**THANK YOUUUU**

_Where do I meet you?_

**I have a car don’t worry about it**

**which dorm are u in**

Mina sends her the details, only realizing later on that letting Nayeon know where she lives is the worst strategy to have in avoiding the older girl.

**see you in an hour**

_see you_

**:)**

/

True to her word, Nayeon arrives an hour later, and Mina’s already waiting for her in the lobby. She didn’t want to give Nayeon the chance to ask for her room number from the front desk, so she knew she had to be down and ready in the lobby by the time the older girl arrived.

Nayeon’s car isn’t anything flashy, it isn’t anything old either. She puts the window down, and loudly calls Mina’s name.

Several heads in the lobby turn to to the car, and follow Mina as her face reddens and she walks toward the car.

“You’re so loud,” she comments, once she enters the car and sits in the passenger seat.

Nayeon doesn’t look apologetic at all, but she tries to do her best to keep a sheepish expression as she half heartedly mumbles a, “Sorry.”

“Your dorm is nice,” Nayeon comments.

Mina nods, but doesn’t say anything else. She knew she was privileged. Her parents were fairly successful in Japan, and she had never needed to get a part time job or a stduent loan. The privilege is awkward for her to acknowledge, and it’s not something she often talks about.

“Thanks for making time to watch with me,” Nayeon says after a while.

Mina glances at her. “Yeah, it’s no problem.” After a while, she says the thing that’s been nagging at her. “Don’t you have other friends to watch with?”

Nayeon hums in response, but doesn’t reply until a few seconds have passed. “Guess so.”

“Why didn’t you ask them?” Mina asks curiously.

“Don’t know,” Nayeon answers, and the Japanese girl doesn’t know if it’s honest or not. “I think I just wanted to get to know you more.”

“Oh. Okay.” Nayeon turns to give her a soft smile, and Mina can’t help but return it.

It’s weird—to suddenly be on Im Nayeon’s radar. They’d known each other for two years now, one of those year she’d spent sitting behind Sana and Nayeon as they kissed, or argued, or held hands and forgot the world around them existed. Nayeon had never batted an eyelash her way. She’d been friendly, and approachable, but every time she’d talked to Mina back then it was to ask about Sana, it was to ask for help to resolve an argument.

Nayeon hasn’t even mentioned Sana once in all the times she and Mina had been together.

“We’re here,” Nayeon says, pulling Mina out of her reprieve. She parks in front of the theatre, and they both get out.

They walk side by side, and Mina keeps a respectful distance between them. She isn’t really that touchy, and she can see that Nayeon’s fingers twitch a bit. Maybe Nayeon’s used to always holding on to someone or something.

Nayeon pays for both of their tickets at the line.

“You don’t have to—“ Mina starts.

“—I want to, and I owe you anyway,” Nayeon interrupts her.

“At least let me buy my own snacks,” Mina says.

Nayeon shakes her head. “Nope,” she pops the “p”. “This is non negotiable, I’m paying for everything.”

Mina wants to argue, but Nayeon is a hard person to say no to. Nayeon simply continues to refute her, and send her big smiles, until Mina finds herself just agreeing.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> ngl ur comments r so cute :(( thank u ! pls dont forget to drop some more :>


	4. don't try to hold me (or speak to me)

Inside the cinema, it’s cold. Mina is extremely thankful that she had remembered to bring her beige coat with her. Nayeon doesn’t seem bothered at first, as she’s wearing a simple camisole and jeans, and Mina can’t help but raise an eyebrow.

They get to their seats in the middle row, and Nayeon kind of tries to whisper-talk to her about something, but since they’re a little late, the film starts just a few seconds after they’ve sat down, so Nayeon quiets down.

It’s funny. It isn’t really Mina’s type of humor—it’s a little much, there’s a lot of swearing, there have been several sex scenes, and three people have been shot—but she can see why it’d be funny. Beside her, Nayeon is all big laughter and crescent eye smiles. She doesn’t even care if she’s being a little too loud.

Halfway through the film, Nayeon starts to shiver a little.

“I should’ve brought a jacket,” she mumbles to Mina.

Mina turns to face her in the darkly lit cinema, and says, “you’re cold?”

“Freezing,” Nayeon says with a pout. “But it’s okay, I think we have like 40 minutes left anyways.”

Mina shrugs her coat off. “What? Mina you don’t—“

“We can share it,” Mina replies, cutting her off. She turns the long coat horizontally, and covers both herself and Nayeon. When she’s done, she gives Nayeon a small triumphant smile.

Nayeon’s expression is unreadable. “Thanks.”

“No problem.”

//

Nayeon tries to hold her hand at some point, during a random out of place jump scare, but Mina makes sure it doesn’t happen. It seems too intimate. She thinks being in a dark cinema, their arms brushing, and sharing a coat is already enough.

Behind her small giggles, Mina thinks about her best friend, and betrayals, and it’s enough to remind her not to get too close.

//

The movie ends, and Mina thanks Nayeon, while Nayeon insists she owes Mina even more.

“We should grab a meal next time, or something,” Nayeon tells her. Nayeon is not much in the habit of asking people, Mina realizes. She’s one of those people who says “should, can, let’s”.

Mina makes a noncomittal sound. “Sure.”

“I really am glad you came to watch with me. That movie was fucking funny,” Nayeon comments as they walk toward her car.

Mina nods her head. “Yeah, it was…something for sure.”

“You’re telling me Emma Watson smacking someone with a baseball bat to death wasn’t genius?”

Mina smiles a bit and shakes her head, and Nayeon pouts.

//

The drive is quiet, because Mina’s not really in the mood to talk. She’s kind of tired, used to spending Saturdays by herself. Nayeon seems to mostly respect this, as she turns on the radio to play some music.

When they near Mina’s dorm, Nayeon says, “next time, you can choose the movie.” It’s casual, and it probably means nothing, but Mina feels her cheeks burn.

“Because, trust me, there will be many next times Myoui Mina,” Nayeon continues, turning to give her a shameless smile. “We’re friends now, after all.”

“Friends,” Mina repeats. She meets Nayeon’s eyes and thinks about how many times she held Sana as Sana cried into her shoulder. Her moutht turns dry. “Sure.”

“Okay,” Nayeon says, parking in front of her dorm. “I’ll definitely see you around.”

“Yeah,” is all Mina says, as she gets out.

//

Nayeon texts her a couple of memes and other things, but they’re fairly unimportant, so Mina finds herself replying late or not replying at all, which doesn’t seem to deter the other girl whatsoever.

Saturday bleeds into Sunday, and soon it’s Monday all over again.

**let’s all have dinner 2nite,** Sana messages in their groupchat.

Tzuyu and Chaeyoung reply with an okay, and Mina agrees as well.

_where?_

**hmm** , Sana says, **anything as long as it’s not Japanese pls**

**can we try the new italian place _,_** Chaeyoung replies.

Tzuyu sends a thumbs up, and so does Mina.

//

Nayeon catches up to her when she’s at the vending machine, waiting for her cup of tea to be finished. Mina has stopped being surprised at this point, in fact, she’s come to expect it.

“Hey,” Nayeon says, all easy smiles, and white teeth. “How was your Sunday?”

Mina takes the cup of tea from the machine. She blows at it. “Good. Yours?”

“Good, too. I got a new pet,” she tells Mina.

Mina raises an eyebrow. “Really?”

Nayeon nods her head enthusastically. “It was a gift from Jennie and her girlfriend. It’s a bunny.”

Mina looks at Nayeon and suddenly realizes the older girl kind of resembled a bunny. “You—“

“—look like a bunny, yes I know.” Nayeon laughs. “I already have two, one from Jeongyeon and another from Dahyun. I guess a third one won’t hurt me. But _please_ ,” she levels a playful stare at Mina. “Don’t give me one too in the future. I’m still a college student. I can’t raise three children on my own.”

Mina finds herself smiling. “Noted.”

“I should’ve known you liked tea,” Nayeon comments.

Mina takes a sip. “Hm. You don’t?”

“Ew, _no_. It’s literally watered down coffee, Mina.”

“It is _not_. It’s better than coffee.”

Nayeon fake gasps. She pulls out her starbucks coffee, the one they sell in those glass bottles. “She didn’t mean that, baby.”

Mina rolls her eyes as she takes another sip of her drink.

“You have class in awhile?”

Mina should lie, but she’s not in the habit of lying.

“No, not really.”

Nayeon beams. “Cool. You wanna do something?”

Mina’s about to say _no, I’m fine, thank you_ when she hears a familiar voice go, “Mina?”

Nayeon’s expression changes, and when MIna turns around she sees Sana and Tzuyu standing behind her.

Sana’s expression is—Mina can’t even describe it, while Tzuyu simply looks nonplussed.

Mina forces her throat to work. She gives Sana a smile, trying to act normal, because _she’s not doing anything wrong_ , she repeats to herself. “Hey, San.”

Sana’s gaze shifts from Mina to Nayeon, and Nayeon’s beaming smile has morphed into something Mina can’t really describe, but it’s unpleasant.

“Sana,” Nayeon says, acknowledging the other girl.

Sana doesn’t reply. Instead, she grasps Tzuyu’s arm, and they turn around and walk off. Mina doesn’t even look back at Nayeon as she follows them.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> wooooooo thoughts?


End file.
